Why women have affairs?
Speak about a loaded issue that no one wants to chat about, that’s it. Funny thing, extramarital affairs have been going on from millennium. Affairs can be burdened with troubles, cause sorrow, and other harms. In addition you have to wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and frankness matter, funds, age difference, spiritual background, remorse, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I will define an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, lonely wife looks for dating.
Why do married people have extramarital affairs? There are as many reasons as there are men seeking an affair. I am conserned generally though it is just the human condition, the need for care, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and cherished. Here are a few reasons I have run across.
Naturally we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is enjoyable and exciting, and sex makes us escape the world for a short period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Somebody are able to switch the wish on and off, some are brilliant at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the stimulation of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another being, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the total romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos the world has erected against married dating. For many people the yearnings will overcome their fears and make them risk the anger of not only their relatives, but the public as well. So why, what is the means?
Sex Addicts, possibly some of us are. Sex is extremely pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically motivated sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not hurt your relatives or anybody else? You would need to reduce the hazard you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the biggest grouping, very big actually. There are many couples whose marriage is over, apart from they feel comfortable in the way they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Also there are the children to consider. Your savings are so knotted. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay as a family besides love and sex.
Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them implementing the sex operation, at least not with their othere half. An extra-marital affair occasionally solves the difficulty while keeping the marriage uharmed.
Avoidance, sadly this is a frequent groung I fear. One or the other, as a rule the male is sexually neglecting his female for a multitude of reasons. As a man I really am grateful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them obtainable to us men of romance, making them “milfs” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but evil.
Something is just misplaced in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, maybe it is a lack of love, maybe caring is disappeared, could be it is the intimacy, maybe neglect. Maybe we have just grown distantly, our common concerns diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is diverce of what you want. Maybe I just do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they seek the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run away, for economic gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.